Spiritual Awakening: The “Subway” Is Heading Toward Spring

Spiritual Awakening: The “Subway” Is Heading Toward Spring

Yang Jing

On the subway, Xiaoran sat on her seat with a pensive and gloomy air, looking out of the window from time to time. She felt that her recent life and mood were gloomy like the tunnel. She reflected on her experience of the job interview from the beginning: Before the interview, she meant to ask for some interview techniques from her husband, who was an old hand at this sort of thing. But then she realized that most of those so-called techniques were actually tricks of teaching people to cheat others, and that as a Christian, she should not do that, for Jesus Christ taught us: “But let your communication be, Yes, yes; No, no: for whatever is more than these comes of evil” (Matthew 5:37). So she decided to practice God’s words—to speak honestly and not to cheat others. She thought that whether she would pass the interview was in God’s hands, and that if she failed, there must be God’s will in it.

Meditating on God’s words, she went to the interview. Facing many technical questions asked by the interviewers, she frankly answered them according to the real situations, even though she was aware that she was not the best one among the applicants. The interview was going very well, and when she felt that it was about to end successfully, an interviewer smiled and said, “We want to know one more thing: Why did you quit your job in the hospital?” Hearing the question, she was a little nervous because she knew that the interviewer intended to judge by her answer whether she had a bad record in her former workplace. After a short pause, she replied, “I’m getting old, and no longer want to do night duty. Besides … there’s more and more contradiction between doctors and patients now. It’s not easy to be a doctor. …” She, who had performed calmly, suddenly appeared to be hesitating, which made the two interviewers surprised. They exchanged suspicious looks, and asked her no more questions.

The announcement of the stop interrupted Xiaoran’s thoughts. She fretfully leaned back on her seat, and then couldn’t help recalling the incident happened several months ago….

On that night, Xiaoran was on duty in the hospital. After changing medicine for a serious patient, she returned to her office. It was 10:30 p.m. at that time. She had to finish a dozen progress notes of the patients, so she hurried to sit down in front of the computer. Around 11:30 p.m., a nurse phoned her and said, “The patient you have just changed the medicine for has a severe headache. He asks to change the ward or move out of the private ward.” Hearing her words, Xiaoran judged from experience that severe headache was the symptom of a patient in the acute stage of cerebral infarction, and that if he moved out of the private ward, he would be easily infected. For his safety, she refused his request. However, unexpectedly, when she finished the work in hand and went to see the patient, she found that the patient was in a state of clouded consciousness. After examination, it turned out that the patient’s condition had changed suddenly and he got a cerebral hemorrhage. Later, he died despite emergency treatment.

After that, the patient’s family demanded compensation from the hospital for Xiaoran’s missing the best time of treatment. Then the several cerebral specialists in the hospital studied and concluded that, based on the patient’s condition, Xiaoran could not delay the progress of disease for him or prevent him from dying even if she arrived on the spot earlier, for the sudden cerebral hemorrhage occurring based on former condition was beyond man’s control and rescue. Though it was the truth, Xiaoran still felt that it was her fault that she hadn’t arrived there immediately. For this, she felt self-blame.

Later, through negotiation, the incident ended after the hospital returned the hospitalization deposits of 30,000 yuan to the patient’s family. Not long after that, the personnel department of the hospital informed Xiaoran that her contract expired. Having experienced the incident, Xiaoran felt that she was tired with working under high pressure there and that she needed a change of scene. So her contract was not renewed.

Then Xiaoran’s thoughts drifted back to the interview again. Never had she thought that the interviewer would suddenly ask her the reason why she resigned when the interview was about to end; nor had she ever expected that she could hide the fact.

The subway train was proceeding rapidly. She stared at her reflection in the window, regret and remorse filling her heart. Suddenly she thought of God’s words: “Why do people engage in such deceit? To achieve their own aims, and to achieve the objectives they desire. And so they adopt certain methods, which shows that they are not upstanding, and that they are not honest. At such times, people’s insidiousness and cunning is revealed, or else their maliciousness and ignobility. With these things, you feel that it is especially hard to be honest; without them, you would feel that being honest is easy”.

God’s words woke up her. She pondered that the reason why she did not tell the interviewers the truth was that she worried about her personal gains and losses. She feared that the dishonorable experience of her neglect of duty might affect the result of the interview and jeopardize her future career, so she evaded the fact subconsciously. At this thought, she felt pain in her heart. She had been eagerly wishing to be an honest person, yet it had never occurred to her that when her interests might be jeopardized, she couldn’t help covering up the truth by telling lies. She naturally revealed her crafty nature, something that was deeply planted in the bones of every person through Satan’s corruption. She had thought of herself as a very honest person before, yet actually it was an illusion. Only then did she realize that she was far away from being an honest person. She felt that she was too much in need of God’s salvation and of judgment and purification of His words.

After she got home, she read some words of God about being an honest person, and one passage said: “Against a certain background or in a certain environment, you felt it was wise, or that there was a good reason to do so, or that you had ample reasons to do so, and ultimately acted, after which you felt you were fully justified in doing so, and had nothing to be remorseful of. When evening came and you reflected upon what you did, or else one day when you gained enlightenment or were reproached, you then felt that the reason for saying those words at that time was not a reason, and that you should have behaved in another way. How should you practice at such times? For example, you did something to someone, you cheated them, or you spoke words that were either inaccurate or contained your own motivations, and so you should go and find that person to dissect what you did, and say: ‘The words I said at that time contained my personal motivations. If you can accept my apology, please forgive me.’ Thus you dissect yourself, and lay yourself bare”.

God’s words made Xiaoran feel relaxed and understand His will: To be an honest person, I should first resolve my intentions and ulterior motives when I speak and do things. Once I realize I have wrong intentions, I should not be anxious to speak or act, but should try to find out the root cause of my wrong intentions. And then I shall seek God’s will and requirements and what God thinks in this matter, and seek how I shall pray to Him for His help so that I can rebel against the wrong intentions and strive to reach the standard of being an honest person under His guidance. I believe if I continually practice like this, I will make ever greater progress in being an honest person…. Thinking about this, Xiaoran made a decision in her heart silently….

Several days later, Xiaoran attended a second interview. She stated to the two interviewers the reason why she quitted her former job and her true thoughts about it, which greatly surprised the interviewers and another doctor who was waiting to be interviewed. They could not imagine that in this society where everyone lived with a mask and everyone took advantage of any situation to benefit himself, there still existed such a person who could voluntarily admit that she was lying and reveal her dishonorable side. After they showed their surprise, Xiaoran noticed a sort of admiration from their expressions. At that moment, Xiao Ran felt that a big rock was removed from her heart, and she had a strongest feeling: It’s so good to practice being an honest person according to God’s requirements. To her surprise, she, though with mediocre qualifications, was hired by the company afterward, and her salary was higher than her expectation.

On the subway back home, Xiaoran reflected on her recent experiences, and she thought of the words of Jesus Christ: “Therefore whoever hears these sayings of mine, and does them, I will liken him to a wise man, which built his house on a rock: And the rain descended, and the floods came, and the winds blew, and beat on that house; and it fell not: for it was founded on a rock” (Matthew 7:24-25). Xiaoran told herself inwardly: From now on, I will consistently practice God’s words. I believe that God will guide me to see more of His wonderful deeds and to know His faithfulness and loveliness. When I gradually obtain the truth as life, won’t it be like building the house on a rock? Having understood God’s will, Xiaoran smiled. The train was rapidly moving to the direction of her house, and she felt that her gloomy life was heading toward the bright and beautiful spring.

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Spiritual Awakening: I Finally Escaped From the Shadow of Death! – Christian Testimony

Spiritual Awakening: I Finally Escaped From the Shadow of Death! – Christian Testimony

Xinzhi

When I was young, my family was poor. My mother had mental illness, so the heavy burden of my family fell upon my father alone. He had traveled many places to seek a cure for my mother’s illness but to no avail. At that time I thought: I must study hard to be a doctor when I grow up. As science is making increasing progress, my mother’s illness can surely be cured in the future. However, it never occurred to me that not only did my mother not get cured, but my sister was also diagnosed with Hepatitis B, which, the doctor said, was an infectious disease and could cause various systemic diseases, even death. In more than one year of her hospitalization, her condition was getting worse and worse. Seeing this, I could do nothing but steal away to cry in private and say in my heart: Sister, hold on for another two years. You are sure to be cured! For science is developing so fast and the wonder drug for your disease can surely be developed. Your younger brother and I can’t live without you…. But she still left us, and my brother and I cried bitterly for her.

Later, I often felt weak and feeble, and had a temperature at a regular time every day, so I went to the hospital for an examination. The doctor told me that I had developed Hepatitis B, which was transmitted from my sister. At this bad news, my mind went blank. I had no idea how I walked home with the test sheet in my hand. After entering the room, I slumped into the sofa, weeping uncontrollably. Seeing this, my husband asked anxiously, “What’s the result? Is it serious?” “It’s Hepatitis B, the same as our sister’s,” I replied weakly in tears. “What if you and our kid are also infected?” I broke down and wailed after saying this. He said as he wiped my tears, “Don’t worry, my dear. We’ll try to find a cure for it. Hasn’t the Hepatitis B vaccine already been developed? Our kid and I can have a vaccination against it. Anyhow, we must try our best to cure it!” Hearing his words, I was a bit comforted.

One day my husband came home from work and said to me excitedly, “Good news! Another new kind of medicine has been developed. It’s said that two boxes of it can guarantee a cure. I have bought two boxes with the help of a friend. Take it and see whether it’s efficient.” I was so happy to hear that, thinking: Science today is so advanced; there must be some medicine that can cure my illness. With the two boxes of medicine taken, I went for a check-up in a hospital, only to find that it didn’t take any effect on me. I thought, “Why can’t the medicine newly developed by scientists cure my illness?” Tormented by the illness, as long as I heard of a type of newly developed medicine or any that could cure me, I would rush to buy it. After a long time of doing this, even I myself couldn’t remember how many kinds of medicine I had taken. Right then, two of my cousins got Hepatitis B, and died off afterward. Their death hit me hard and I began to fear that I would also die one day. Every time I thought of this, I would shed bitter tears. Hardly could I imagine what would become of my kid if I died.

Several years later, more and more illnesses attacked me: bone deformation resulting from rheumatism, dim sight, stiffness of legs and feet joints, and lags in response. And consequent complications, such as heart disease, diabetes, gasteremphraxis, fatty liver, and cholecystitis, all set in successively. I became so weak that even a few quick steps would make me breathe heavily. And I often caught a cold. The doctor said my immunity had decreased due to regular medication, and thus various complications were induced…. I dared not take that much medicine from then on. Right at that time, someone introduced health products to me, and I, eager to get cured, spent all my money on various health products and tonics, hoping to improve my immunity through these high-tech products. But after a period of time, they didn’t take effect, and even caused great harm to my stomach—it would ache if I ate, so that I could only drink millet gruel every day. After I had experienced that medicine and health products didn’t work on me, I began to watch TV programs and read books about scientific regimen. But after a while, my health was declining. I could do nothing but stay like a useless person. I was upset every day and sank into extreme distress. I often wondered: Science today is so advanced; isn’t there any cure for my diseases? I’m still so young; do I have to wait for death helplessly?

Right when I was cornered, Almighty God’s kingdom gospel came upon me. I accepted it and regularly attended meetings and read God’s words with brothers and sisters. During one meeting, after a sister had learned my condition, she read me two passages of God’s words: “Where did the pain of birth, death, illness and old age present throughout the life of man come from? Because of what people first had these things? Did man have these things when they were first created? They didn’t, did they? So where did these things come from? These things came after the temptation of Satan, after man’s flesh became degenerate. The pain of the flesh, the troubles and emptiness of the flesh and the extreme wretchedness of the world came from Satan’s torment of man after it had corrupted them. Man then became more and more degenerate, the illnesses of man were deepened, their suffering became more and more severe …”. “Almighty God, the Head of all things, wields His kingly power from His throne. He rules over the universe and all things and He is guiding us on the whole earth. … Praise God in the midst of illness and enjoy God in the midst of your praise. Do not lose heart in the face of illness, keep seeking and never give up, and God shall shine His light to you. How faithful was Job? Almighty God is an all-powerful physician! To dwell in sickness is to be sick, but to dwell in the spirit is to be well. If you have but one breath, God will not let you die. The life of the resurrected Christ is within us. We really lack faith in the presence of God, and may God put true faith within us. … Faith is like a single log bridge, those who cling abjectly to life will have difficulty in crossing it, but those who are ready to sacrifice themselves can pass over without worry”. Then she fellowshiped with me, “From God’s words, we can see that when man was created in the beginning, they didn’t have the suffering of illness. It was only after man’s ancestors committed sins under the temptation of Satan that man began to experience birth, aging, sickness, and death. And as man became more and more corrupt, man’s illnesses were deepened, and even kinds of strange diseases have occurred in recent years. So, all the illnesses we have come from Satan’s affliction. Nevertheless, God’s words tell us: It is God who rules over all things in the entire universe; although Satan can corrupt man, it cannot control man’s life and death. Take when Job was tempted by Satan, for example: Though his body was covered in boils, God didn’t permit Satan to take his life and it dared not overstep the mark. In the midst of his illness, Job still held onto his faith in God, and he didn’t complain to God but praised His name. In the end, God made Job emerge from his troubles and doubly blessed him. Sister, God has pointed out a path for us—have faith in God as Job, truly rely on Him, commit our illnesses into God’s hands, and let Him dominate and arrange them.” After her fellowship, I finally realized that all my illnesses arose from Satan’s affliction. So I said, “Sister, I understand what you have fellowshiped. It is Satan that has been afflicting me. What should I do now?” Then she fellowshiped much in detail about my problem. She told me to read more of God’s words, taught me how to pray to and rely on God when in difficulties, and told me not to demand God with my own motivations but to only obey His sovereignty and arrangements. Thereafter, I read God’s words every day and attended meetings on time, which especially enriched my daily life. My secret worries were much lightened and my heart was also much liberated.

Before long, the church arranged for me to take on hosting duties. I was glad to hear that and agreed without hesitation. When I first took on the duty, I even had difficulty taking vegetables upstairs. Somehow, after a period of time, my health gradually improved. I became vigorous, and it was easier for me to do the household chores than before. The steady improvement in my condition also delighted my husband and my kid. Later, I had myself examined in a hospital and the doctor told me that my Hepatitis B was gone. I could hardly believe it, so I had a second examination in another big hospital. But the result was the same. The doctor there said, “Judging by the test result, your body has produced the antibody and you won’t be infected with Hepatitis B anymore even if you contact the virus.” At the doctor’s words, I was wild with joy and lost for words. I never thought that my Hepatitis B, which hadn’t been cured by every possible means, should be cured in such a miraculous way. I couldn’t help praising God from the bottom of my heart: God, it’s You who has pitied and cured me. It’s You who has freed me from the torment of the illness. Many thanks be to You!

One day, I read the following words of God: “From when man first had social sciences, the mind of man was occupied by science and knowledge. Then science and knowledge became tools for the ruling of mankind, and there was no longer sufficient room for man to worship God, and no more favorable conditions for the worship of God. The position of God sunk ever lower in the heart of man. A world in man’s heart with no place for God is dark, empty without hope”. I suddenly saw the light. In the past, I used to believe that highly developed science and technology were able to solve all man’s difficulties. When I fell ill, I thought that science would develop effective medicine which could definitely cure my illness. Consequently, when I heard there were newly produced drugs, I rushed to buy them, when I heard that health products were good, I bought them without delay, and when I heard of scientific regimen on TV, I studied it immediately. In the end, a great deal of money and effort had been wasted, and my condition got worse and worse—I just awaited death. Through God’s words and my own experiences, I was completely clear that science is not the truth, much less can it save man. Because of my blind faith in science, I strayed ever further from God and lived more painfully and helplessly. Later I read these words of God: “Whenever Satan corrupts man or engages in unbridled harm, God does not stand idly by, neither does He brush aside or turn a blind eye to those He has chosen. … as man grows up, Satan’s gaze is fixed on every one of them, like a tiger eyeing its prey. … In the process of growing up, you may encounter many things that are not to your liking, encounter illnesses and frustrations. But as you walk this road, your life and your future are strictly under God’s care. God gives you a genuine guarantee to last all your life, for He is right there beside you, guarding you and looking after you”. Only then did I understand that God has been right there beside me ever since I was born. I had suffered from serious diseases, but God didn’t allow Satan to take me captive. My illness is in God’s hands, so is my life. Satan had covetously eyed me and afflicted me with illness, but without the permission of God, death would not come upon me. It is God who has been guarding and keeping me all the time. With gratitude, I went before God and prayed, “God, it’s Your great love that has saved me! When Satan used science to afflict and deceive me, I tasted the bitter fruit of believing in science. But when I struggled hard on the edge of death, it was Your loving hand that led me to return before You, and Your words gave me confidence and power. What was more unexpected was that You had removed my illness before I knew it. How wondrous and almighty You are! Thanks be to You for Your great love and mercy for me. May all the glory be to Almighty God!”

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Daily Bible Devotions: Which Is Greater in Your Heart, God or the Temple?

Daily Bible Devotions: Which Is Greater in Your Heart, God or the Temple?

By Lin Lin

The Bible records, “But I say to you, That in this place is one greater than the temple. But if you had known what this means, I will have mercy, and not sacrifice, you would not have condemned the guiltless. For the Son of man is Lord even of the sabbath day” (Matthew 12:6-8). When I was a new believer, I read these verses. At that time, I only knew the Lord Jesus was saying this to remind people who lived under the law that He is greater than the temple and that He is Lord of the Sabbath day. Therefore, He could heal patients on that day, and He didn’t condemn His disciples who plucked and ate the ears of corn when they went through the corn fields on the Sabbath. Yesterday I read these verses again. From the fact that He worked on the Sabbath day, I clearly realized the Lord was reminding people who lived under the law that He had done new work outside the temple, and that everyone should depart from the temple to accept His new work.

However, during that time, the Pharisees who slavishly abided by the laws and rules saw the temple as greater than God. Apparently, they served God in the temple and explained the laws to the people, but they only talked about some letters, rules and restrictions. They themselves never complied with the law. Worse still, they renounced God’s law, killing prophets and devouring widows’ houses. Hence, in the eyes of God, all they did had nothing to do with His will and requirements; their service was merely going through the process of sacrificing, and was idol worship. They had no place for God in their hearts for they valued the temple, their status and livelihood above God and the truth He expressed. As a result, though having heard the Lord Jesus’ preaching, seen various signs and wonders He manifested, and perceived His power and authority and wonderful deeds, they did not at all have the heart to seek the truth or look for a way to be compatible with God. Besides, they judged the Lord Jesus, saying that He was just an ordinary person, condemned Him, and blasphemed that He cast out devils by the prince of the devils. They even joined hands with the Roman government to crucify the Lord Jesus. Ultimately, they were subjected to God’s righteous punishment and curse and were destroyed in hell because they offended His disposition.

Then let’s turn to the followers of Judaism who were deceived by the Pharisees. They too saw the “temple” as greater than God. For example, they viewed those chief priests, scribes and Pharisees as greater than God. So, when deceived and incited by the chief priests, they lost the rationality and ground that a believer in God should have. Not only did they fail to stand on the side of the Lord but they blindly followed the chief priests and yelled out to nail the Lord Jesus to the cross. They lacked penetration into the truth of the hypocrisy of the chief priests, scribes and Pharisees, and didn’t know these people who served God saw their own status and the words of the Bible as greater than the Lord. These so-called “God’s servants,” taking “defending the true way” as camouflage, fabricated various rumors and made up lies to deceive the people. They controlled the people firmly in their hands, frantically disturbed and impaired God’s work, and competed with God for people. Therefore, the Jews who followed them also perished and were destroyed in the end.

So, what kind of people are those who honor God as great? I thought of Job. When all his children died and all his properties were taken from him, grieved as he was, he didn’t sin with his lips against God but still extolled His name. Job said, “the LORD gave, and the LORD has taken away; blessed be the name of the LORD” (Job 1:21). Job had a place for God in his heart. For Job, his sheep and cattle, wealth and children couldn’t compare with God, because God was the only One in his heart. Job could honor God as great in his heart, so he received greater blessings from God after he underwent the trials. Peter was another example. As he followed the Lord Jesus, he carefully obeyed His voice and acted in accordance with what He demanded. At a critical time, when the soldiers tried to seize the Lord Jesus, Peter rushed over and cut off a soldier’s ear, disregarding his own life to protect the Lord Jesus. From this I saw Peter loved the Lord more than himself, which cannot be reached by ordinary people. Peter’s actions gained the Lord’s approval. Therefore, the Lord Jesus gave the keys to the kingdom of heaven to Peter and entrusted him with the heavy responsibility of shepherding the churches.

When thinking of this, I prayed to God and reflected: Which is greater in my heart, the “temple” or God? The fact that the Pharisees resisted God gave me a warning. That is, if I believe in God but in my heart I don’t honor Him as great, nor do I know, obey or worship Christ incarnate, then all that I have done will be in vain in His eyes no matter how I believe in Him, follow Him, and sacrifice and expend for Him. I should emulate Job and Peter: No matter what trials I encounter, I shall believe in God’s sovereignty and have true faith in Him; no matter how God’s work and word do not conform to my own conceptions and imaginations, I shall put myself aside to obey Him. Only in this way can I become someone who genuinely follows God and honors Him as great in his heart. Brothers and sisters, let’s honor God as great in our hearts in everything. Then God’s blessings and grace will surely be with us!

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I Saw the Mighty Power of God’s Word in Spiritual Warfare I

I Saw the Mighty Power of God’s Word in Spiritual Warfare I

I’m an ordinary rural woman. After marriage, I often quarreled and had fights with my husband over trivial matters, living in agony every day. I considered dying many times, but at the thought of my young child I had to give up the idea of suicide. As such, my daughter became my only hope and support for survival.

In November of 2007, one of my classmates preached the gospel of the kingdom to me. I saw these words of God: “Since the creation of the world I have begun to predestine and select this group of people, namely, you today. Your temperament, caliber, appearance, stature, family in which you were born, your job and your marriage, the entirety of you, even the color of your hair and your skin, and the time of your birth were all arranged by My hands. Even the things you do and the people you meet every single day are arranged by My hands, not to mention the fact that bringing you into My presence today is actually My arrangement. Do not throw yourself into disorder; you should proceed calmly. What I allow you to enjoy today is a share that you deserve, and it was predestined by Me at the creation of the world”. After reading God’s words, I understood that my marriage and family were both ordained by God, and that I was predestined to believe in God long ago. I didn’t complain anymore. Soon afterward, I began to live the church life, praying, reading God’s words, and singing hymns to praise God with my brothers and sisters. I felt especially liberated and was free from the painful life that I used to lead. Hopes rose in my heart.

Seven months after I believed in God, my daughter, who was a high school student, went home for the summer break. That day, I went out for a meeting. My daughter happened to discover a note I put in a pocket where I copied down some words of God. When I returned home from the meeting, she looked very unhappy and asked, “Are you believing in God?” “Yes. How did you know that?” I replied. Then my daughter said angrily, “Our principal said at a school meeting that belief in God is opposed by the national government. The students whose parents believe in God will be forbidden from taking the college entrance examination, their employment will also be affected. Make your own decision!” Hearing her say this, my heart sank. Believing in God is a good thing. How can it be this way? In confusion, I said, “God comes to save man and asks man to be good people. He doesn’t participate in the politics of man. How could believing in God affect your further education and employment?” My daughter was snappy, saying, “Anyway, our principal said such things. Even if you don’t care for yourself, you should consider me.” Then she left. I felt awful and pondered over my daughter’s words. Could what she said be true? What if she can’t find a good job in the future? Should this be the case, won’t her future prospects be ruined by me? Won’t she blame me forever? Inside me there was a fierce battle. I was torn between my daughter’s future prospects and God, who gave me the truth and life. I just can’t bear to give up my belief in God. Oh, what am I to do? The more I thought about it, the more upset I felt. I was unable to eat or sleep well. During the several days that followed, I had been indecisive about this matter.

Just when I was at a loss and distressed, a sister in the church came to my home. I told her my difficulty. Then she said to me, “Man’s future and fate are in God’s hands. They are not decided by any person. Let’s see some of God’s words. God says, ‘From the moment you come crying into this world, you begin to perform your duty. You assume your role in the plan of God and in the ordination of God. You begin the journey of life. Whatever your background and whatever the journey ahead of you, none can escape the orchestration and arrangement that Heaven has in store, and none are in control of their destiny, for only He who rules over all things is capable of such work. Since the day man came into existence, God has been steady in His work, managing this universe and directing the change and movement of all things. Like all things, man quietly and unknowingly receives the nourishment of the sweetness and rain and dew from God. Like all things, man unknowingly lives under the orchestration of God’s hand’. From God’s words we can see that the destiny of every one of us was arranged by God. As to whether your daughter can attend college or what kind of job she may get in the future, God has the final word. They are not up to any man, or the government.” Then I thought: Man’s fate is indeed in God’s hands. It is not decided by any person. I wished to find a great partner and live a happy life in the first place, but things just didn’t turn out that way. God’s words are correct! At this time, the sister went on to say, “God is testing our faith by allowing such a situation to befall us. It is a battle in the spiritual realm. When Satan is carrying out its cunning schemes, God wants to see whether we can stand firm and bear witness in Satan’s attacks. Let’s look at another passage of God’s words. God says, ‘Because God has become flesh, Satan has employed all sorts of methods of accusation, wanting to attack God this way. However, God does not retreat because of this—He just speaks and works among mankind and allows people to know Him through His incarnate flesh. Satan is red-eyed with fury and has put forth a great deal of effort on God’s people to make them negative, retreat, and even lose their way. But because of the effect of God’s words Satan has failed, thus adding to its wantonness. This is why God has reminded everyone: “In your lives, there may come a day when you will meet with this kind of situation: Would you willingly allow yourselves to fall captive to Satan, or will you have Me obtain you?”’. God wants to save man and free them from the bondage of Satan so that they may live in the light. But on the other hand, Satan tries to disturb and tear down God’s work and cause man to lose the opportunity for God’s salvation. Satan knows that you love your daughter most, so it uses her to disturb you and attempts to make you reject and leave God. Once you leave God, you will be under Satan’s domain, and you’ll be taken to hell by Satan. This is the treacherous intention of Satan.”

Through the sister’s fellowship, I understood it was Satan’s plot. I said to her, “It turns out that Satan was using my daughter’s words to disturb my mind and make me weak and push God away. I was almost fooled by Satan. It was so close! I can’t fall captive to Stan and allow it to take me to hell. I must stand on the side of God. No matter what my daughter says in the future, I will absolutely not waver. May God give me faith.” The sister nodded with a smile.

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Tonight, the Dormitory Light Comes On

Tonight, the Dormitory Light Comes On

Chenxi

It was freezing cold in winter. The whole city was like a big icehouse. In the evening, Chenxi was on the way to the self-study classroom. Pulling up her collar higher, she rapidly put her hands into her pockets. She thought, how cold it was!

Two years ago, like many students who left their homes, she left her parents and came to the city to study. She imagined having a wonderful campus life and everyone striving toward their own ideals. But the reality broke her wonderful yearning.

In her dormitory lived six girls with very different characters, three of whom were the “only daughter.” They all had different living habits. As time went by, many conflicts appeared. Formerly, Chenxi always indulged her roommates, not quibbling over many little things in life. She thought believers in God shouldn’t act the same as unbelievers. She, therefore, always forbore with their unreasonable requests. However, these days, as soon as it grew dark, her roommates would turn the light off to see movies. Their reason was that turning off the light could create an atmosphere of cinema. This thing troubled her a lot. She wanted to read books and review lessons in the dormitory, for she would get exams after some time and she didn’t want to go to the self-study classroom on her own at night. Though she had tried many times to consult with them on whether they could turn on the light, their attitude was nevertheless rather inflexible. Every time they broke up in discord.

She had to brace herself to walk toward the self-study classroom. The more she thought about it, the more she felt angry: Is it reasonable not to study? You can see movies, but why insist on turning off the light? You are indeed selfish. Considering she was for studying, she even more felt what she did was correct while her roommates were at fault. Looking at the empty campus, she thought: Other students must be in their dormitories. If my roommates had not insisted on switching the light off to see movies, I wouldn’t have gone out suffering this. … At that time, she suddenly realized: It’s wrong to think in this way. Am not I falling into the influence of Satan? She hastened to pray to God silently in her heart, “O God! My stature is too small. When things happen to me, I always fixate my eyes on others, thinking they are not good. I’m often angry with my roommates at such trifles. Please keep me from living under Satan’s control. …” After the prayer, she remembered God’s words, “People do not require much of themselves, but they require much of others. They must be patient and forbearing of them, cherish them, provide for them, smile at them, be accommodating to them, and yield to them. … and they cannot …do anything that they would not like. Man’s reason is so lacking!” “Your reputation has been destroyed, your bearing is degrading, your way of speaking is lowly, your life is despicable, and even all of your humanity is lowly. You are narrow-minded toward people and you haggle over every little thing.” She examined herself while walking on the road. She recognized that the reason why she felt angry and aggrieved was not on account of others’ problems actually, but was that her nature was too selfish. For fear that her roommates hindered her from studying, she held some views against them, thinking they were selfish. In truth, it resulted from her selfish nature. Consequently, once her roommates’ deeds involved her interests, she would begin to fuss over things and quarrel with them, living by the poison of Satan “Everyone for himself and the devil take the hindmost.” She also realized that today, that she suffered coldness was the consequence of being unwilling to relinquish herself. God’s words revealed that we mankind are unqualified to require much of others. God said that it is an expression of lacking a reason to require too much of others and ask them to go with our own ideas. She came to realize that as a Christian, she should practice according to God’s words in all things but not be angry with classmates in this way, or she would lose testimony before Satan. Thinking of those, she prayed silently to God, “O God! Today I realize that my nature is too selfish. When my roommates’ deeds are disagreeable to me, I am unwilling to obey, and even have quarrels with them, having no likeness of a Christian. God, I’m willing to practice the truth and obey the environment You arranged. May You lead me to put it into practice. …” After praying, she immediately had strength, no longer feeling that their turning off the light was wrong, but instead feeling that she should adjust to them and should not ram her opinions down their throat. It was the manifestation of arrogance and selfishness.

When understanding these, she wanted to go back to the dormitory, instead of going to the self-study classroom alone. Regardless of whether she could read books and whether the deadlock among them could be resolved, she was willing to face it. Because the intention of God was to let her learn to put herself aside. This lesson was arranged by God, was which she needed to enter. And also, she needed to transform herself.

Chenxi went toward the dormitory. Her heart was still somewhat uneasy, for she didn’t know what waited for her next: maybe an unlighted light, their dissatisfaction or anything else …

She pushed open the door nervously. A warm air blew into her face. “You are back, Chenxi. Have you eaten dinner? Turn on the light and eat your dinner.” A roommate said to her. In an instant, she blushed, asking, “Won’t I interfere with your seeing movies?” “Oh, it’s okay. In the future, we’ll see movies with the light on. Eat your dinner while it is still warm. …” She looked around at her roommates. Hesitating for a moment, she put on the light. She felt the light tonight was especially bright. She couldn’t help smiling, pleased, beyond all concealment. She was so surprised how their attitude could be changed so greatly. She sighed with emotion that she just practiced a little truth but received such a big surprise. She felt that God is too amiable and lovely!

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The Lord’s Burden Is Light, Then Why Is My Life So Tiring?

The Lord’s Burden Is Light, Then Why Is My Life So Tiring?

Hello, Brothers and Sisters of Loving Stage!

Now I have a difficulty and I’d like to seek your advice. I’m tightly bound to my family and can never let my children go, which causes me to lead a very tiring life. My eldest daughter-in-law has just given birth to a baby and I need to look after her. My younger son is old enough, but he hasn’t started a family. Moreover, we borrowed money and bought an apartment for him and now we have to repay the bank loan every month. Having these things on my mind all day long, I often cannot quiet my heart to read the Bible or pray. Even though I have prayed to the Lord, I receive no release in the spirit. Every evening when I come back home, I feel extremely exhausted both physically and mentally. Sometimes I’m so tired that I suffer a headache and even feel that my life has no meaning. The Lord once said: “Come to me, all you that labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. … For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light” (Matthew 11:28-30). I believe that the word of the Lord is faithful. And I also want to act in accordance with His word, put aside these worries and troubles, and live a free and liberated life. How come I can’t put it into practice but even live more and more tiredly?

Baijie

Hello, Sister Baijie!

We quite understand your situation, for each of us once had different sufferings. Before we can live by the Lord’s word, it can be said that we are all bound and troubled by the family entanglements. It is like a net enmeshing us so that our hearts are always occupied and controlled by it. It is really miserable. The Lord Jesus said: “Come to me, all you that labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. … For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light” (Matthew 11:28-30). We believe that the Lord’s word is faithful, but why can’t we gain true release even though we have prayed to God and relied on Him? To answer this question, let’s read a passage of word.

This is what a book says: “Though man allows God to look within his heart, this does not mean that he is capable of obeying the orchestrations and arrangements of God, nor that he has left his fate and prospects and his all under the control of God. Thus, regardless of the oaths you make to God or your attitude toward Him, in God’s eyes your heart is still closed to Him, for you only allow God to look upon your heart but do not permit Him to control it. In other words, you have not given your heart to God at all, and only speak nice-sounding words for God to hear…. Which is to say, God has the right to observe, but He does not have the right to control. In the subjective consciousness of man, man does not want or intend to leave himself to the mercy of God. Not only has man closed himself off to God, but there are even people who think of ways to wrap up their hearts, using smooth talk and flattery to create a false impression and gain the trust of God, and concealing their true face out of sight from God. Their aim in not allowing God to see is to not allow God to perceive how they really are. They do not want to give their hearts to God, but to keep them for themselves. The subtext of this is that what man does and what he wants is all planned, calculated, and decided by man himself; he does not require the participation or intervention of God, much less does he need the orchestrations and arrangements of God. Thus, whether in regard to the commands of God, His commission, or the requirements that God makes of man, man’s decisions are based on his own intentions and interests, on his own state and circumstances at the time. Man always uses the knowledge and insights that he is familiar with, and his own intellect, to judge and select the path he should take, and does not allow the interference or control of God. This is the heart of man that God sees” (“God’s Work, God’s Disposition, and God Himself II”).

These words are very true. Though we pray to God, we never really intend to leave our life under His control. Instead, we want to rely on our own abilities to arrange and plan for our children’s life. We always try to plan and decide everything by ourselves, and often expect that the course of events will conform to our thoughts and imaginations. However, only God can rule the fate of each and every one of us, because only He is possessed of such power and authority. We are just creations and have no authority or power to control the fate of ourselves or others. So we naturally feel distressed, worried, and lost when we don’t attain our goals after putting in a lot of effort or the results of things are not in line with our notions and imaginations.

In fact, if we really want to entrust our difficulties to God, we must truly give our hearts to God, accept and obey His sovereignty and arrangement over our life and fate.

Here we’d like to share a passage of word with you. We think it gives us a path of practice. It says: “When confronting real-life problems, how should you know and understand God’s authority and His sovereignty? When you do not know how to understand, handle, and experience these problems, what attitude should you adopt to show your intention, your desire, and your reality of submitting to God’s sovereignty and arrangements? First you must learn to wait; then you must learn to seek; then you must learn to submit. ‘Waiting’ means waiting for the time of God, awaiting the people, events, and things that He has arranged for you, waiting for His will to gradually reveal itself to you. ‘Seeking’ means observing and understanding God’s thoughtful intentions for you through the people, events, and things that He has laid out, understanding the truth through them, understanding what humans must accomplish and the ways they must keep, understanding what results God means to achieve in humans and what accomplishments He means to attain in them. ‘Submitting,’ of course, refers to accepting the people, events, and things that God has orchestrated, accepting His sovereignty and, through it, coming to know how the Creator dictates man’s fate, how He supplies man with His life, how He works the truth into man. All things under God’s arrangements and sovereignty obey natural laws, and if you resolve to let God arrange and dictate everything for you, you should learn to wait, you should learn to seek, you should learn to submit. This is the attitude that every person who wants to submit to God’s authority must take, the basic quality that every person who wants to accept God’s sovereignty and arrangements must possess. To hold such an attitude, to possess such a quality, you must work harder; and only thus can you enter into the true reality” (“God Himself, the Unique III”).

As a created being, we should learn to wait, seek, and submit through the people, events, and things we encounter every day. This is the behavioral principle of us Christians, and it is also most able to illustrate whether we have true obedience and reverence for God. In the process of practice, we’ll have some knowledge of how God rules over and supplies all things, and see that the more the people, events, and things we encounter are incompatible with our conceptions, the more it contains God’s good purpose. It is through these people, events, and things that God wants to test our faith in Him and see whether we have His place in our hearts. He wants to test whether we can willfully do what we like and whether we try to change the life and even the fate of our family and ourselves with our own two hands. And the result of the test is: When the course of events is disagreeable to us, we’ll live in pain and distress, feeling that our life is full of untoward things and disappointments, and even live in silent resistance and complaint toward the Lord. Outwardly, we say nothing, while in our hearts, we misunderstand the Lord and complain why He doesn’t bless us so that we can live easily and comfortably since we have believed in Him. Little do we know that it is not that the Lord doesn’t bless us. Actually, it is because we don’t believe in or submit to God’s sovereignty that we can’t give our prospect and fate to God or submit to His orchestrations and arrangements. If we have no true faith in the Lord, then we cannot sincerely come before God, much less can we receive the comfort and satisfaction that comes from having God with us. When we find that we indeed have failed to practice truth to satisfy God, it will impel us to examine our relationship with God and inspire us to seek God’s will and practice truth. Today you wrote to us to pour out your distress of living in pain and confusion and actively seek God’s will. We believe that under the guidance of God and His words, and through our communication, you’ll have a deeper understanding of God, see how God rules over our destiny and supplies our needs, and how He reveals to us the pain caused by us changing our fate with our own hands, and see it is all because we don’t like the truth and don’t give our hearts to God. After realizing these, you will understand God’s earnest intention in His arranging such an environment for you, and also find a proper way of practice. If you, when fulfilling your responsibility and obligation as a mother, can let God lead your everyday life, and learn to let nature take its course and act according to God’s word, He will surely help you out of troubles and worries. May God lead you and enable you to receive release and freedom soon and live in His light. Amen!

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